Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Life's Not Fair

Well, I was prepared, so I thought I would be able to deal with it, but I can't.  I'm completely devastated.  In typical Navy Detailer fashion, it looks like we are losing our orders to London.  I don't want to go into too much detail because I cried all day yesterday and I have things to do today besides lay on the couch and sob and watch Law and Order, but the gist of it is that the detailer put Nick in for the Worst Job in the History of Ever (flag aide) and even though he's 'pretty sure you won't get it' we still have to wait to NOT get it.  And while we wait, the orders for London also wait.  And possible get snagged up by someone else, because who DOESN'T want to go to London?!?!

I'm getting all worked up again.  What it boils down to is waiting.  And we all know how good I am at waiting.  Remember the driver's license fiasco? And even if he doesn't get the Worst Job in the History of Ever (and I have a sinking feeling that he just might get it, meaning we would have to stay here) the waiting game jacks up EVERYTHING and we probably won't be leaving over Christmas like we planned.

We've done all we can do.  He's plead his case to the detailer.  That's basically all we CAN do.  Another guy on the boat used to be a flag aide, and he agrees that Nick probably will NOT get the job, so I'm trying to convince myself that if nothing else, he won't get it.  But it's hard, especially with Europe on the line.  This is basically our last chance to travel.  Nick has six years left before retirement. Six? Maybe seven.  He went in when he was twenty, and twenty plus twenty is forty.  Yes? And he is...thirty four? Thirty five? He was born in seventy eight.  I think he's thirty four.  So six.

Wow.  In six years, my husband will be forty.

Anyway, not the point.  So right now he's doing his Department Head tour (which sucked assballs, for any JO wives reading this and wondering what life will be like in four years.  SUCKS ASSBALLS. DON'T DO IT) and next is his post department head shore tour (which was supposed to be London) and then is his XO tour, then another shore tour, then we're done.  And we plan on doing both XO and post XO shore tour in Washington state, where we want to retire.  So this is it.  Our last chance for travel.


Anyway.  We're in a holding pattern.  The only thing we can do is hurry up and wait.  And pray.  I don't want to talk about it, because I don't want to think about it, because it's literally making me sick to my stomach, but please, pray.  Not just that I get what I want, but that I can find some peace.  If we're trapped here for two more years, I don't want to be a miserable nervous wreck the entire time.

Ugh.  Things were going so great!!!

Anyway.  Here's some pics of my kids.  Hopefully their cute faces will make me not want to kill myself.

Nope.  Their sweet faces just remind me of all I could have exposed them to if we'd gotten to go to London.  This sucks.

But hey, if we stay here, we get to spend two more years across the street from the jail!!! So that's pretty sweet.

And if you're ever unsure about when playtime is over and it's time for food or sleep, just wait for the crying.

That's EXACTLY what I look like right now too buddy.  I feel your pain.


  1. Holy suck! I am SO sorry to hear this. The bad news I have for you is....XO is worse than DH. I'm glad you'll do it somewhere you like (I hope) because even being "home" it was horrid :(

  2. Oh no! That sucks SO bad, fingers crossed that you still get your London orders, but I know I wouldn't be able to stop thinking/stressing about it either. I wasn't 100% positive about getting to keep these Hawaii orders until we actually landed here.
    Good luck chica!