Thursday, September 6, 2012

Confessions

-Sometimes, I'm too lazy to even handle paper plates, so I serve my children waffles and pancakes on paper towels.  Not with syrup though.  Obviously.



-If I'm sneaking bites of crap off the kids' plates (paper towels) I don't track it.  I think this contributes greatly to the fact that my weight loss is at a complete and total stalemate.


-Sometimes (a lot of times) I know they're lying when they tell me they brushed their teeth, but I pretend to believe them so I don't have to manage that fight.


-I fantasize multiple times a day about what it would be like if we didn't have kids.



-Sometimes I make a lot of noise (or actually just poke her and prod her) to wake Daisy up so that I "have" to bring her into my bed to calm her down, then she ends up staying the whole night.

-I told Scott yesterday that Nick set up secret video cameras in the house and when he gets home, he's going to watch it all and see if Scott was obedient.  This is obviously a huge lie.

-I leave my van doors and trunk open so that birds will come in and eat all the goldfish.  A bird pooped on the backseat last week and I told the kids it was their fault for always leaving the door open and made them clean it up.

-Until very recently, I thought that the vice president's name was John McCain.  I was pretty confused.

-I accidentally threw out some papers I needed from preschool the other day, so I told her I never got them.

-I never watch the news.  Ever.  Hence my knowledge of current events (and names of vice presidents.) Instead, I change the channel when Matt starts talking about that stuff in the mornings and watch Gallery Girls or Pregnant in Heels instead.

-One time when I worked on labor and delivery, my favorite doc (who I had a total girl-crush on) was going on and on about Arrested Development and I just laughed and laughed and totally pretended like I'd seen every episode and loved it all.  I had never ever watched it.  I just started watching it last month and I wish I could go back in time, watch it when it was on, and actually have a conversation with her about it.  It's pretty much the funniest thing I've ever seen.


-My baby has eaten nothing but goldfish, cheerios, and pretzel sticks for the past three days.  Literally.

-I am a terrible mother, and whenever anyone talks about being a terrible mother and all the things they're going to change and do better, I pretend I'm going to do it too, but really, I don't mind so much, and I'd rather watch Law and Order than read to the kids anyway.

-When this guy sat in front of us at the beach the other day, Nick immediately started referring to him as the Hulk and we laughed off and on for at least an hour at his expense.
That's all I've got for the day. But look at this pic I took Monday, and one I took two years ago.  It makes me cry.  I can't believe my baby is three.  And a half.




And I really liked this shot, so I did a side by side.  Actually, the SOOC is pretty great, if I do say so myself.  Shooting at noon with not a cloud in the sky is NO JOKE.  I used my super flash for this.

And since I picked it as my Favorite Shot of the Day, here it is in black and white.  Oh, last confession: I am a black and white ADDICT.  There, I said it.

2 comments:

  1. Perfect Color Smooth Skin action is creepy looking :(

    Otherwise, pics are great and the bird shit thing was HILARIOUS :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. PAPER'S????!!!! MY HEAD IS GONNA EXPLODE! :P

    ReplyDelete