I get confused. A lot. Half the Internet World seems to want me to relish in the NOW. To Stop the Schedule, to Burn the To-Do Lists (my list, today, for those who are interested, says 'take a shower' and 'dinner????' with lots of question marks. Does this mean to make dinner? To decide what's for dinner? Or is it just a question: are we having dinner? Who knows.) to Sit Still and Relax and Enjoy the Moment.
But then the OTHER half of the internet wants me to GET SHIT DONE. Because I need to be HUSTLING everyday. I'm supposed to Make Something Beautiful Everyday. After all, I Have the Same Amount of Hours in a Day as Beyonce. (Side note: I'm calling bullshit on this one. No. I do NOT have as many hours as Beyonce. Say whatever you want about Money Can't Buy Happiness, but it sure as shit buys time. If I didn't have laundry and sweeping and cooking and driving and dishes [as I am POSITIVE Beyonce does NOT have] then I could spend my days BURNING THE TO-DO LISTS while simultaneously GETTING SHIT DONE.)
What is my point? I have no idea. Used to be, I would automatically side with the RELISH in the NOW camp because I am lazy and doing nothing is certainly easier than doing anything else. But I also want to GET SHIT DONE. Call me cray, but sometimes living in filth really gets me down. Stepping on wet, half chewed goldfish crackers for the seventeenth time makes my skin crawl. I want my vacay pics sorted and edited and bound in a gorgeous glossy book so I can look at them with Dub. (He's the only kid who ever wants to take OR look at pictures. He is my favorite.)
So how do I decide which LIFESTYLE I want? No, I'm asking for reals, this isn't rhetorical. I need to know. They both seem to have a pretty solid argument.
Obviously, I know the answer should be MODERATION. The Internet World Mothers LOVE to talk about moderation. But what exactly does that look like? How can you moderate between two such POLAR OPPOSITES? How can you tell the dust bunnies to hush while you rock your babies, while simultaneously maintaining a clean and tidy desk so you can create all the things?
I don't want to miss the moment I'm in!!
But I want to be rewarded!!
I love staying home!!
But c'mon, I need to make some magic too!!
And I certainly don't want my mind to be untidy...
Well now this has just turned into me finding things on pinterest. So I better just quit. But I'm not supposed to quit!! And I'm also not supposed to be a slave to the computer!! I don't get it!!!