Her mama. The woman who carried her inside my own body- she left me to go hang out with her friends and teachers.
She has been away from me before. I used to work nights, but Nick was there. And for the brief few months when he was gone AND I worked nights, she went to sleep at the home of our beloved Fern.
|Vacay in the OBX, Aug or Sept 2006|
Then there were the six nights I spent in the hospital delivering her siblings, but Nick went home to check on her, and she came to the hospital to see me, and my mom was there once and Michelle was there once and the last time Laura watched her and Nick went home at night anyway.
But I did leave her once, or rather, her daddy took her away from me, for a weekend in Florida when I was massively pregnant with Scott and couldn't get time off of work.
|Hunter, Ava, Hayden, and Grandma Jean, Dec 2006|
And I left her properly, twice, a weekend in Paris with my mother two years ago...
...and a weekend in Copenhagen with the girls last autumn. But Nick was obviously home with her.
The girl has never been away from both of us and I feel like I'm going to die.
I don't care that she's nine. I don't care that everyone else is doing it, I don't care if she's having fun. I don't care. I want my baby back. She's MINE. She belongs with me.
Also, Gramma Terri, if you're reading this, I'm still mad that you didn't come get me at Tyndall. But I am glad you made me stay at Auburn.
PS: That pic isn't at Tyndall. You can tell because I'm not sobbing. If I had to guess, I'd say it's the week before, because the day we got out, I let Angela cut my hair. Wanna know how we did it? She ran her hands thru it, and whatever peeked out over her fingers, she cut off. Teenagers are so good at making decisions.